I recently received a parking ticket (or “Parking Infringement Notice” as they call them in newspeak) in the mail from Maribyrnong City Council, my local council. The letter that came with the ticket states:

“The Enclosed Parking Infringement Notice was unable to be attached on the vehicle or served to the driver of the above vehicle registration number, on the said date of offence. The notice is therefore served on you as the registered owner of the vehicle by post.”

There is no explanation as to WHY it wasn’t attached to the vehicle or what the offence actually was. All the ticket says is the street where it occurred, the time and “DOUBLE PARK”. The street happens to be where my kid’s school is and it’s about the time in the morning where I drop them off. The suggestion is that I double parked while dropping my kids off to school but was obviously not parked there long enough for the parking inspector to knock on my window or stick a ticket on my screen.

And I NEVER double park. So I’ve send them a letter telling them to prove it. What a fucking cheek.